“To leave the world better than you found it, sometimes you have to pick up other people’s trash.”
— Bill Nye
Last week, I wrote about the need to go deeper in my recovery. I’m confident and comfortable in my sobriety and in the healthy habits that support it. But I also know that I continue to react to events with old thought patterns—beliefs and emotional imprints formed long ago. These often lead to unhelpful or unhealthy reactions, what can fairly be called maladaptive behaviors.
This week, I’m using the SMART Recovery ABC tool, based in cognitive behavioral therapy, to examine and adjust my thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. It helps uncover the beliefs behind emotional reactions and guides healthier responses. This ABC activity is very useful as a post-mortem to examine past events, learn from them, and be prepared for future events.
Here is this week’s ABC example:
Activating Event: A few months ago, during a group hike near Portland, we came across a pile of garbage dumped along a rural road at the trailhead—the scene captured in the above photograph. I felt immediate anger, and that anger spoiled my walk that morning.
Belief: I despise purposeful littering and illegal dumping. I want those responsible to be held accountable—or at least receive a strong dose of karma.
Consequence: The anger I felt lingered. In the past, this kind of unresolved upset would add to a mental pile of frustrations that could eventually push me toward numbing behaviors. Not this time.
Dispute: Malicious behavior by a small number of people is rare. Harboring general anger at specific instances won’t solve the problem, nor will it help my emotional health.
Effective New Belief: I cannot control others. But I can control how I react. Rather than let anger poison my day, I can acknowledge it, accept it, diffuse it—and then pick up the trash, when possible, making the place better than I found it.
I can’t control others or the world, but I can control myself and my reactions. I can choose to make a positive difference.