“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.”
— Buddha
I’m a couple of days late with this week’s post, missing my self-imposed Thursday deadline. And I’m completely at peace with that. I chose instead to enjoy a road trip through central Washington, traveling part of the Cascade Loop with a good friend. We drove long miles on rural roads, photographed landscapes, and embraced a sense of adventure. A missed deadline was a small price for time well spent.
Recently, both my own reflections and a friend’s observation made me aware that my posts have been leaning toward the “safe” end of the emotional spectrum. Topics like mindfulness practice, healthy routines, stable sobriety, and passion for photography are all true—and all important. But they aren’t the whole story.
There are deeper and darker chapters in my past that I avoid writing about—topics tied to shame, guilt, resentment, or anger. Experiences painful enough that I’ve hesitated to confront them, let alone share them. Some of these memories could upset others or even risk judgment or rejection. And although I’m not ready to detail those experiences publicly, I recognize they are threads woven through my thoughts, emotions, and behaviors—even now.
But ignoring it hasn’t freed me from its influence on my life.
I’m beginning to see that part of moving forward means turning toward those moments with honesty and curiosity. I plan to focus upcoming journaling on the critical events that led me toward escape, numbing, and self-limiting beliefs. Through self-reflection, awareness, and conversations with my therapist and trusted loved ones, I hope to find whatever resolution or understanding is needed.
This work will require vulnerability, courage, and emotional openness. I may walk it with the support of others—but ultimately the path is mine to travel.